What does it really mean to “Trust and Obey?”
I recently found out.
God has graced me with a job I love; one that allows me to use my past experiences to make a difference in the lives of hurting young people. I’ve been there for over two years and it has been the most difficult and most amazing work I’ve ever done. I can’t imagine being anywhere else.
Recently I was offered a promotion to shift supervisor. To be honest, I really didn’t want it. The current shift supervisor is over-worked, under-appreciated and she was suffering for it. I knew, almost instantly, that this wasn’t God’s plan for me and it was easy to say, “no thank you.”
Days later, a brand-new position opened up. I’d heard whispers about this position for the last year and ever since the very first hint, I wanted it. Desperately. When the position was finally posted, I jumped at the chance to apply. I’ve been doing a lot of the work already and thriving on it. It came with a pay raise and would be an excellent selling point on my grad. school application. And did I mention I really wanted it? This was absolutely the right job for me.
The only catch? I’d have to work Sunday mornings.
Now, I knew that this wasn’t an option. I knew where God wanted me on Sunday morning, and it wasn’t at work. Through other very clear, very obvious messages, God let me know that I needed to say, “no thank you” again. Only this time, I didn’t want to. I argued with God about this for days. I tried refusing. I tried begging. I tried bargaining.
Over and over again I heard God tell me, “Say no, Bethany. Trust me. Obey me.”
I went along my merry way, ignoring God and the sick feeling in my stomach that came from knowing I wasn’t following God’s plan. Surely God wanted this job for me? Surely He wanted me to get a raise? I found myself thinking, if God really doesn’t want me to have this job, He’ll make sure they choose someone else. At the eleventh hour, God told me, yet again, “Say no Bethany!”
I broke.
My God has shown me over and over and over again that He will do what He has promised and that His plan for my life is better than mine could ever be. He has shown me that He will orchestrate every movement of my life and that I can trust Him. So I did.
I walked into my program manager’s office, mere minutes before she was going to make the final decision. I sat down with her and told her I was going to make her decision easy. I said, “No thank you,” and told her why.
And then God provided my own little ram in the thicket.
My program manager told me that from the very beginning the job was mine; they just had to do things properly. She then said that she knew how important church was to me and she was waiting for me to say so. She handed me two job offers. One was for a Sunday through Thursday shift, the other was for a Tuesday through Saturday shift. She'd gotten approval to offer me either of them. All I had to do was ask.
All I had to do was obey.
Had I not gone to her, I would have still gotten the job, and I would have gone to work every Sunday morning knowing that I was being unfaithful. I would have gotten that pay increase, and every extra penny would have been a reminder of my disobedience.
Instead, I acted out of obedience and things snapped into place. God asked me to give up something I really wanted, and He gave me something better.
Amen.
