They keep things in - and keep things out. They mark boundaries - this is mine and that is yours. They offer protection. Safety... and security.
There are fences all over; boundaries we define for the well-being of ourselves and society. Some in the physical sense and others as guidelines for behavior. We also build emotional fences.
To keep things in - and keep people out. To mark boundaries - me here, you there. To offer protection. Safety.
Much of the time, those fences are good for us. It's important to know your limits and to guard your heart. It's important to judge wisely what (and who) we give a place in our lives.
I've written before about trust - and my lack thereof. I've written that people aren't safe. In many ways, that's true. By the very nature of human relationships, the people we allow into our lives have been given the power to hurt us.
It happens.
Hurt is a part of life; and it's a part of love.
Sometimes people hurt us deliberately and bulldoze over our fences - for power, for satisfaction, for control... or maybe because they've been hurt and all they know is to lash out at someone else. Most of the time - in healthy relationships - people hurt us accidentally.
They don't mean to, it just happens.
Part of life. Part of love.
Sometimes the fences we build are bad - when we use them to hide from the world.
In my life I've built a lot of fences. There's nothing scarier to me than people who know too much. At times - though very rarely - I've expanded my boundaries - or maybe just opened the gate - to make room for people. It has always been a hard, hard blow when things don't turn out the way I want them to, and it seems like the more room I've made for them, the worse the response. I rarely react in a way that is healthy or wise.
Usually, I build my fences smaller and smaller, shutting out everyone. Usually, I even shut out God. I tell myself, "letting people in is stupid. Letting God in is stupid." It certainly feels that way, even though sometimes (like with God), it isn't.
Let's go back to security again - after a tangent or two.
I'm considering another tattoo. I know, I know... many people don't approve of them and I understand their reasoning. However, those tattoos I choose to get aren't frivolous or done on a whim. They're carefully thought out and have a deep meaning. They represent something I want, or perhaps need permanent reminders for.
This time I'm looking at a tattoo that represents love - and NOT a heart. Heaven help me. I hate cliche.
There are two reasons for wanting a symbol of love:
First, there is an organization called, To Write Love on Her Arms. You can read their story on their website, but their main purpose is to raise awareness and provide support for those struggling with self-harm and suicide. These issues hit home. And I want to write love on my arm.
Second, in keeping with the theme of my most recent tat, I've chosen the Adinkra symbol for love, because it is also a symbol for security:
EBAN - which
literally means fence. (Weird, huh? Fence = love? Interesting).
It is the symbol of love, safety and security
"The home to the Akan is a special place. A home which has a fence around it is considered to be an ideal residence. The fence symbolically separates and secures the family from the outside. Because of the security and the protection that a fence affords, the symbol is also associated with the security and safety one finds in love. "
-- from The Adinkra Dictionary
Interesting indeed.
Psalm 46(NKJV):
1 God is our refuge and strength,
A very present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear,
Even though the earth be removed,
And though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea;
10 Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!
Many have said that the Scriptures are a love story - between God and His people. They show how high and how deep is His love for us (Ephesians 3:18), and the lengths He will go to prove that love.
You know, like sending His Son to die on a cross.
Scriptures also show that His great love for us allows us to rest securely. Love and security. They go hand-in-hand, don't they? God's love builds a fence around us - a hedge of protection that keeps us safe - from the powers of this world and from ourselves.
Thankfully, unlike our own fences, God's boundaries are perfect. He provides guidelines to keep on the path He's set out for us. He knows us so well and so deeply that He knows exactly what we need to stay safe. Even when it doesn't feel safe. Even when He doesn't feel safe.
Because sometimes He doesn't. Maybe because He knows too much. And gets inside our fences and into the darkest places in us.
Psalm 139:
1 O LORD, You have searched me and known me.
2 You know my sitting down and my rising up;
You understand my thought afar off.
3 You comprehend my path and my lying down,
and are acquainted with all my ways.
4 For there is not a word on my tongue,
But behold, O LORD, You know it altogether.
5 You have hedged me behind and before,
And laid Your hand upon me.
We need fences... and we need some fences to be torn down.
Lord, give me the wisdom to know where to build my fences. Amen.
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