I am an Heiress?

I hesitate to even write about the Siesta Fiesta because it seems as though my experience was so far removed from everyone else's. See, I didn't really have "fun."

I mentioned a meltdown - let me tell you right now that I was completely debilitated by terror. I cannot even begin to describe how difficult it was to even go in to the arena and sit down. And I don't know what scared me most - being completely alone and having no one to talk to or being surrounded by people who might want to talk to me.

No. Most assuredly NOT fun.

But a deliberate, purposeful and NECESSARY act of God? Absolutely. After all, I am an heir of God; my life is not left to chance.

It was a CHOICE encounter.

I could have sworn Beth's message was meant for me - despite everything (which I may or may not get into later) it was no mistake or accident that I was in San Antonio to hear God speak through Beth Moore.

Those spiritual 2x4s were swinging left and right and every single one of them hit their mark. But that phrase above...

I swear, it was like a punch to the gut. Beth said that and I literally gasped as though the wind had been knocked out of me.

Because, in a way it had.

I walk around every single day of my life wrapped up in insecurity. Is that anyway for an heiress to live?

No it isn't.

And through the words of a beautiful and dynamic spiritual POWERHOUSE, God told me He's had enough. Time to claim my inheritance.

Ouch. My head is still ringing.

San Antonio Recap Video & Siesta Fiesta Picture

I will write a recap later... I am exhausted right now.

I tried to embed the video and it didn't work so... to see the larger sized version, click here. You can also see it on the LPM blog.

And this is the "small" (I just have to laugh at that) group picture that I happened to be in with Beth, Amanda, Melissa, Travis and Kelly Minter and Vicki Courtney... and as a bonus, Lisa McKay (The Preacher's Wife) who, all weekend long, I was too shy to introduce myself to (more on that later).

So I made it...

I made it!!

I had a bit of drama when I got to my motel - "armpit" is an UNDERexaggeration. But I got over it. I had some more drama driving around downtown San Antonio. And even more when I spent three hours walking through the RiverCenter mall by myself.

I wanted to go home.

I got over that too.

See, the real problem is, this whole trip is entirely outside my comfort zone. Going to a new place, surrounded by people I don't know... The unfamiliar frightens me and I had a meltdown. And because I'm 1,500 miles away from everything I know and love (I actually REALLY miss my kids) I was terrifyingly alone. I had no one to reach out to.

Except God.

So I spent the bulk of my awake time over the last 24 hours praying to the God that will never leave me or forsake me, even if I am 1,500 miles from home.

I'm never far away from Him.

I'm never alone.

Pretty wonderful, isn't it?

Oh, and can I just say that our Creator God has a stupendous imagination? I flew over the Grand Canyon yesterday. It looks amazing from the air - when you can see for miles and still not see all of it. Our God is an awesome God.

Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almighty.
The whole earth is filled with His Glory.
(Isaiah 6:3)